Wednesday, January 26, 2005
The Arisia Report - brought to you through the sniffling fog
I am ill. Not in any sort of overtly biological projectile fashion, but ill nonetheless. I mention this only because it has blunted and blurred my mind slightly. So, please, bear with me.
Arisia. Brilliant. Much fun. The Park Plaza was lovely with the exception of the snowy television, the non-alarmist alarm clock and the only bar being closed for a private function while we were snowed-in Sunday evening. To clarify, McCormick & Schmick’s was closed and the Todd English debacle, while serving intriguing food was hardly a proper bar… and no, there was no mini bar option. In fairness I should mention that the bed was lovely and the staff very helpful… however these things are not in the least related. I got enough back of house nookie when I worked at the Ritz. So last century.
Costumes were fab. Masquerade impressive. Goth beachwear fashion show? Eh… but the lifeguard and the winning junior and senior art school Goth girls were mad fabulous. If anyone has pictures send me the link. Please? Despite my solemn vow to take more pictures than I took as Noreascon I took none. I am a reprehensible ruin.
Two great parties: Skank Saloon and The Chris Party. No one seemed to know who Chris was and there were a multiplicity of “skanks”. I myself was merely bawdy… I mean, really, who could compete with the puppet-master a.k.a. Bunsen Honeydew Gynecologist and his lovely writhing assistant? The Queer Fandom party was entertaining but bereft of alcohol… No, really, it still had its moments. I had smuggled in my own.
I met lovely people. Nice people. A few very attractive people… and a few people that further cemented my firm belief in skimming the gene pool on a regular basis. I discussed the Iraq war with a polyamorous male/female married couple. This also marked my first documented sighting of an actual practicing bisexual male within the poly community. Must not have been local. Some of the gene pool people on the other hand… definitely local.
Let’s see… I learned how to discipline a horse. I found out way too much about Henry the Eighth, but the incidental orator in this case was not without a certain charm. I learned that it is very difficult to make a living off of web comics. OK, I had it carved in stone and sealed with blood that it is very difficult to make a living off of web comics. I did the Time Warp with a crutch and cast; demonstrated the proper way to be swallowed by a boa constrictor; and made-out with a Midwestern bear at the post midnight dance in between flailing around singing along to Sisters of Mercy. No, not the nuns, dear. It wasn’t that kinky. Drew strange pictures in green light listening to Pink Floyd, total college flashback. “Got snowed in.” Really got snowed in. Attended a wonderful panel on Dr. Seuss. And, it was all over way too soon.
More random details later, and thank you to Larkin, John, Chad, Lars, Kate, Ayden, Jesse, Troy, the volunteers and the pros and various and sundry persons familiar and unknown for making this a grand weekend.
Oh… and if anybody knows where on the internet I can find naked photos of the bartender in the Indiana Jones hat from the Skank Saloon party??? PLEASE let me know. I need to wallow in a mire of unrequited and pointless lust just a wee bit more. It was refreshing feeling inadequate and sixteen again. LOL!
Arisia. Brilliant. Much fun. The Park Plaza was lovely with the exception of the snowy television, the non-alarmist alarm clock and the only bar being closed for a private function while we were snowed-in Sunday evening. To clarify, McCormick & Schmick’s was closed and the Todd English debacle, while serving intriguing food was hardly a proper bar… and no, there was no mini bar option. In fairness I should mention that the bed was lovely and the staff very helpful… however these things are not in the least related. I got enough back of house nookie when I worked at the Ritz. So last century.
Costumes were fab. Masquerade impressive. Goth beachwear fashion show? Eh… but the lifeguard and the winning junior and senior art school Goth girls were mad fabulous. If anyone has pictures send me the link. Please? Despite my solemn vow to take more pictures than I took as Noreascon I took none. I am a reprehensible ruin.
Two great parties: Skank Saloon and The Chris Party. No one seemed to know who Chris was and there were a multiplicity of “skanks”. I myself was merely bawdy… I mean, really, who could compete with the puppet-master a.k.a. Bunsen Honeydew Gynecologist and his lovely writhing assistant? The Queer Fandom party was entertaining but bereft of alcohol… No, really, it still had its moments. I had smuggled in my own.
I met lovely people. Nice people. A few very attractive people… and a few people that further cemented my firm belief in skimming the gene pool on a regular basis. I discussed the Iraq war with a polyamorous male/female married couple. This also marked my first documented sighting of an actual practicing bisexual male within the poly community. Must not have been local. Some of the gene pool people on the other hand… definitely local.
Let’s see… I learned how to discipline a horse. I found out way too much about Henry the Eighth, but the incidental orator in this case was not without a certain charm. I learned that it is very difficult to make a living off of web comics. OK, I had it carved in stone and sealed with blood that it is very difficult to make a living off of web comics. I did the Time Warp with a crutch and cast; demonstrated the proper way to be swallowed by a boa constrictor; and made-out with a Midwestern bear at the post midnight dance in between flailing around singing along to Sisters of Mercy. No, not the nuns, dear. It wasn’t that kinky. Drew strange pictures in green light listening to Pink Floyd, total college flashback. “Got snowed in.” Really got snowed in. Attended a wonderful panel on Dr. Seuss. And, it was all over way too soon.
More random details later, and thank you to Larkin, John, Chad, Lars, Kate, Ayden, Jesse, Troy, the volunteers and the pros and various and sundry persons familiar and unknown for making this a grand weekend.
Oh… and if anybody knows where on the internet I can find naked photos of the bartender in the Indiana Jones hat from the Skank Saloon party??? PLEASE let me know. I need to wallow in a mire of unrequited and pointless lust just a wee bit more. It was refreshing feeling inadequate and sixteen again. LOL!
